I am scared and excited all at the same time. For 5 years now people have looked to me to share my experiences and lessons learned as a result of being on the Biggest Loser. And I have done so with humility, trying to put into perspective that it was a extraordinary experience that was as far from reality as can be. Reality is not being taken from your life and having 1 primary focus in life for the time being, well let me step back and speak for myself, it was not my reality.
I thought that I was lucky because of the way my experience was I had the opportunity to experience having such focus while at home. And while I did work and manage my relationships I still had a primary focus of losing as much weight as possible as fast as I could.
As much as I was successful with that, my life is not one with the primary focus of losing weight and constantly focusing on what I’m eating when. Sure I am probably more conscious about it than those who have never had an issue but it does not define me. I have probably even gone to the opposite end of the spectrum to “prove” if you will that I don’t have to and that I can enjoy what everyone else is.
Well over the past 5 years this has added up and now I find myself at a point of my life where I am somewhere in the middle. I am not fat by any means and in most respects pretty healthy. However I am heavier than I like to be and I know, without having the exact numbers that my body fat percentage is not where I want it to be!
I want to figure out how to get to the weight and body fat percentage that I feel comfortable in without it being my primary focus but to get there and maintain there through balance. I want to feel beautiful again which I consider to be strong and confident. I don’t want to be somewhere in the middle, mediocre. I want to be fit beyond doubt, I want to know that I can continue to challenge my self physically and emotionally, I want to know that I walk the talk and that it is so evident that not even I can invalidate it.
So it’s time to address the elephant in the room, yes I have gained weight. I am not proud of it but I am not ashamed either, it is just where I am right now and I am going to change it. Tomorrow I weigh in and I will be documenting and sharing my journey through my show Live Big With Ali Vincent.
Here we go!
xo-ali
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